Dealing With Disappointment

Dealing with disappointment is a tricky thing. It is never nice to have your hopes and expectations dashed.

Disappointment comes when you have allowed yourself to believe that something will happen, and it turns out not to be the case.

It is very easy to allow this disappointment to consume you and to become a beast that sucks away your positivity. But life will always throw a curve ball your way. You just have to remain focused and realise that just because something didn’t turn out the way you expected it to, it doesn’t mean that that door is now closed. And even if it is, it doesn’t have to be the end of the world.

Perhaps it is just a case of reformulating a plan, or seeing if there is a different way to get there.

If there isn’t a way of making it happen, maybe you need to look at adjusting your expectations.

In any case, disappointment is disappointing, but it is important not to let it tear you down completely. Have a moment to rage about it if you must and then put it to bed. Dwelling on stuff never helped anyone!

Use the energy you would have spent feeling cross or deflated and instead channel it towards your revised plan or new course of action. It is the only way to move forward.

How do you deal with disappointment?

That Thing You Want To Achieve: Keep Trying

Keep on trying. It might feel like pushing water up hill, but that doesn't mean it will always feel that way. | quote | ms moem

Sometimes it feels like
pushing water uphill.
It might feel impossible now
That doesn’t mean it always will.

That thing that you want to achieve probably won’t happen over night. You know this, otherwise you’d have already done it. But sometimes, on the way to doing something we really want, we get overwhelmed with the options, and the setbacks, and the effort without any concrete results; it can all just feel like a huge waste of time. It’s like whatever we try just isn’t right/good enough/well-received << delete as appropriate.

But nothing fabulous ever happens without someone somewhere making it so.

The only certainty with not trying, is that you will never know just how great it could have been.

So, when you think about that thing you want to achieve, tell yourself to keep trying and never give up! Focus on how good it will feel when you get there!

This is post 70 of 100 blogs in 100 days.

100 blogs in 100 days

On The Subject Of Problems

Everyone has problems. So they say.

But not everyone shares them.

Some people find problems everywhere.

Some people overshare.

How do you deal with problems? Do you keep them quietly to yourself or do you seek out people to listen?

I’ve always been a stubbornly independent sort of a girl. I can’t stand being told what to do and I think that holds me back from disclosing my issues from fear of being told how to deal with them. Written down, that sounds ridiculous, but it is how I feel.

saying i'm fine is like putting a wall around your problems | quote | Ms Moem

There is also a niggling worry that the person I am talking to isn’t particularly interested, and when I get that feeling, it really isn’t conducive to sharing my innermost thoughts. So I change the subject. Or talk about what I think they want to talk about (usually them) or something universal like the weather, or what we’ve had for tea.

It can be tricky as non-problem sharer though, because with all the will in the world, sometimes you do just need to talk to someone. The trouble is, that once you’ve been pigeon-holed as a private person, it feels even more awkward to bring up topics that expose your vulnerabilities. And I am sure we’ve all been on the receiving end of an “How Are You?” which is much easier to answer with an “I’m fine!” than with anything deeper or more descriptive.

So the barriers appear to be up. It’s all very well building a wall around your problems, as long as you make sure you are on the other side. You don’t want to be trapped with your problems forever. My strategy for dealing with problems as a non-sharer is to first categorise whether it something I can do something about or not.

If I can do something, I do it. Even if I can’t do it immediately, I form a plan of what I can do, and when.

If I can do nothing, I try my best just to let it go. Some things are harder to let go than others. Some problems require you to sit with them for a while, and perhaps cry; letting your emotions go. There is a difference between crying it out and wallowing however. I don’t like to wallow. It gets me nowhere.

So that’s how I deal with problems. Have you got a strategy for problem solving?

This is post 63 of 100 blogs in 100 days.

100 blogs in 100 days

What’s Your Cup Of Tea?

What’s your cup of tea?

For me it has to be Twinings English Breakfast tea. Milk and two sugars thanks! I’d have to see your teaspoons to confirm the sugar amount officially though. There are some rogue-sized spoons, either too big or too small, on the streets today. *said Goldilocks! 🙂

twinings english breakfast tea

It’s one of the little pleasures in life. Tea is my favourite drink. I’ve drunk it for as long as I can remember. I grew up on loose leaf tea, but find tea bags so much more convenient. I still have fond memories of teapots though; particularly my Grandma’s. She always had a self-knitted tea cosy on hers. The wool was lovely and warm to the touch and kept the pot active for long enough for us all to have a brew or two.

I’ve gone through all manner of tea bags to find my one true match, and Twinings English Breakfast has my heart. I don’t think I’ve drunk another brand in the last seven years at least. I am so particular about it, that I carry some in my handbag…. just in case an impromptu brew opportunity should arise!

So, dedicated to my favourite tea brand and to the nation’s favourite drink as a whole, here’s a little poem about tea.

Ode To Twinings English Breakfast Tea

No greater pleasure can there be
Than a cup of English Breakfast tea.
Boil the kettle, get your cup
Add the bag and fill her up.

Let it steep; infuse to taste.
Take your time, no need for haste.

Do you take sugar?
One lump or two?
Lots of milk?
Or will just a splash do?

Then find a place
(Your favourite spot)
Sit back, relax
And drink the lot.

A note of caution,
And only one,
Be sure to drink it
Before the heat has gone.

It’s a rite of passage
That we all go through;
The mistaken gulp
Of an ice cold brew.

So, those slurps excluded,
No matter what time of day
A nice cup of tea
Blows the cobwebs away.

Whatever the weather
The sun instantly starts shining
From the contents of the cup
When you experience the joy of Twinings.

Ode To Twinings English Breakfast Tea is a poem by Ms Moem.

This is post 58 of 100 blogs in 100 days.
100 blogs in 100 days

Father’s Day

happy father's day! | ms moem

Today Father’s Day is celebrated in:

Afghanistan
Albania
Antigua and Barbuda
Argentina
Aruba
Bahamas
Bahrain
Bangladesh
Barbados
Belize
Bermuda
Brunei Darussalam
Canada
Cambodia
Chile
People’s Republic of China
Colombia
Costa Rica
Cuba
Curaçao
Cyprus
Czech Republic
Dominica
Ecuador
Ethiopia
France
Ghana
Greece
Guyana
Hong Kong
Hungary
India
Ireland
Jamaica
Japan
Kenya
Kosovo
Kuwait
Laos
Macau
Madagascar
Malaysia
Malta
Mauritius
Mexico
Mozambique
(March 19) Myanmar
Namibia
Netherlands
Nigeria
Oman
Pakistan
Panama
Paraguay
Peru
Philippines
Puerto Rico
Qatar
Saint Lucia
Saint Vincent and the Grenadines
Singapore
Slovakia
South Africa
Sri Lanka
Suriname
Trinidad and Tobago
Tunisia
Turkey
United Kingdom
United States
Venezuela
Vietnam
Zambia
Zimbabwe

Happy Father’s Day to all the Dads around the world!

Poem For Father’s Day



Proper Dads is a poem for Fathers Day written by Ms Moem.

This is post 55 of 100 blogs in 100 days.
100 blogs in 100 days

Accept What You Can’t Change

Accept what yuo can't change | quote | Ms Moem

Accept what you can’t change. There is no point in worrying about things you can do nothing about, nor using them as sticks to beat yourself with.

Change what you can't accept - quote | Ms Moem

But on the other hand, if you absolutely cannot accept something, make a change! Whether physical change or emotional change, tell yourself that you are the master of your own happiness and see what happens.

This is post 51 of 100 blogs in 100 days.

100 blogs in 100 days

And then what?

And then what? #quote Ms Moem

We all all have our dreams.  Some bigger than others.  Some comfortable and safe.

But in the setting of goals, if you want to push yourself a little further, ask yourself if your dream came true, what would come next?

Those three little words ‘And then what?’ hold the key to your ultimate desires.

Give it a try!

Sometimes you might be harbouring the idea that you need to go via A,B,C,D,E when really you just want to be at F. By thinking about the ‘And then what?’ for each step of the way, you might find that F is closer than you previously thought, or that with a bit of creativity you could actually have ‘F’ today!

So the person who wants to set up a business, with the hope that eventually they’ll be able to take a few days a week off to be able to take it easy and go travelling – do they really want to run a business? Or do they just want to earn enough to travel to the places they’ve always wanted to go? Are there places nearer home that they could see today at a cheaper cost? Is there a job they could take in the short run to be able to pay for the first leg without having to invest all their earnings back into a business for x amount of years?

There’s always more than one way to get to any destination. Maybe your ‘And then what?’ could shape and refine your journey!

This is post 49 of 100 blogs in 100 days.

100 blogs in 100 days

#MyFuturePast

If I could go back in time and give myself some words of advice, inspiration and motivation, it would have to include the following:

Dear #MyFuturePast,

Talk more. People don’t know what you don’t tell them.

Learn to take advice. You don’t know everything, and likely never will.

learn to take advice | quote

Don’t ‘not do’ something for fear of what other people might say. If it works out for you, they’ll likely be supportive, and if it doesn’t, no-one will ever know. Not doing it only means you’ll never know what might have happened.

Seize opportunities when they arise because that set of circumstances will never arise in that exact way ever again.

Be more social. People aren’t out to get you.

Nobody cares what you look like. Don’t use not looking like everyone else as a stick to beat yourself with. You’ll only ever be you; make the most of it.

nobody cares what you look like | quote

Be willing to fail. Better to have tried and lost than to have never tried at all.

Don’t be so stubborn. You’re only making life difficult for yourself.

Every new day is a gift and time waits for no man.

Bearing grudges is pointless. Let it go. Direct your energy towards more positive feelings.

let it go | quote

You can have more than one friend. Putting all your eggs in one basket is not a wise strategy, no matter how loyal you are.

Make the most of everyday. It is easy to rest on your laurels, but you’ll have so many more memories to look back on if you keep going each and every day.

Start things and finish them. Just having the idea gets you nowhere!

start things and finish them | quote

Other people don’t have things better than you; they have it different. Forget wishing you had x, y and z, and embrace your individuality.

Take down those barriers; you are not an island.

you are not an island | quote

Be brave.

Regrets are futile. Live your life.

What would you tell your #MyFuturePast?

This is post 39 of 100 blogs in 100 days.

100 blogs in one hundred days

 

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