The run up to Christmas isn’t always a happy time. It can also be fairly reflective. Time to think about those empty chairs around the table, perhaps not being able to afford the gifts you want to give, or even worrying about how you are going to put food on the table at this consumer-led time of gluttony and indulgence.
In fact, these points don’t only relate to the festive season. I’m sure there are lots of people out there whose lives aren’t perhaps quite what they hoped for or are simply going through a tough time. It can cause you to question the choices you have made, and the circumstances that surround you that you perhaps have little or no control over.
Basically, life isn’t always a bed of roses.
So, what can you do to prevent drowning in a pool of despair?
Whilst it can be all consuming to have problems, or to feel that you don’t have the life you want to have, having the focus on what’s lacking isn’t great for the soul.
I used to be a permanently positive person. Then over the last few years, life has dealt me a few curve balls and changed my entire outlook. The main thing that triggered this change was losing my mother. Obviously, this was completely out of my control and I was powerless to do anything but try to deal with it in my own way. Some days are easier than others but at the moment the not-so-good days seem to be forcing their way to the forefront.
This was an emotional juggernaut of change which tested my resilience to the very limit. Things that have happened since then which I would previously probably have been able to deal with effectively and quickly now feel like issues on top of issues – double strength!
Sometimes, talking helps. Then sometimes, talking just causes more reflection which just fans the flames of sadness. I suppose everyone has to find a way to deal with stuff that suits them and the situation.
However, on the whole, I feel it is better to try and focus on the positives. This can be tricky and still the negative stuff tries to get in the way but counting your blessings has got to be more cheerful than constantly analysing your problems. Worrying and moping just breeds more of the same.
Despite my loss, I have a lot to be grateful for. It can be easy to take stuff for granted but perhaps it just means looking for those things a little harder. Then you just have to keep that focus! (easier said than done)
Do you struggle to focus on the positives? Do you count your blessings daily, or do your problems consume you and prevent you from seeing the good?
Focus On Your Blessings
Sometimes life is tricky.
Sometimes things go wrong.
Sometimes you feel out of place
Or like you don’t belong.
Sometimes bad things happen.
Sometimes you might feel scared.
But focus on the positives;
If you seek them, they’ll be there.
If your brain won’t stop whirring,
And you can’t sleep at night,
Step out of the darkness
And look into the light.
The bad things won’t vanish
But don’t let them consume
It just makes you miserable
And intensifies the gloom.
So focus on your blessings
And let them shine through.
Don’t let the negatives
Be what defines you.
Focus On Your Blessings is a short poem about life by Ms Moem.